Signs of a perfect sex partner

"Do I have a perfect sex partner?" If not, how can I get one? Indeed a million dollar question that hovers in the minds of most couples! 
Though it might be hard to find an absolute sexually compatible partner, but most couples don't even know the traits that they or their better half should posses to be a perfect sex partner. 
Having an outstanding sex partner takes a huge burden off an individual's mind. It allows them concentrate more on the act, instead of thinking too much about whether they're making love to the right person or not. When it comes to a perfect sex partner, attributes like height, weight, age, behaviour, choices etc take a backseat. What matters is that he/she suits you and shares an amazing chemistry in the bedroom. 
Dr. Kirti Mishra, a clinical physiologist and a relationship expert elucidates, "The idea of a perfect sex partner varies for different individuals, but some common traits like sexually active, experimental in bed, hygienically sound etc are a must, as they are the key for finding sexual bliss. Most couples today are working on their personal attributes to match their partner's prerequisites and thus become a perfect sex partner." 
Apart from good looks, a hot body and a heady sex drive, let's explore the less superficial elements of what makes a perfect sex partner. And if your partner bears these qualities in bed, you can unquestionably boast of having a great sex partner... 
1. Hygiene holds the key 
Everyone likes making love to a clean and tidy partner, so good hygiene holds great importance in a sexual relationship. Ensure that your partner is well manicured with a fully waxed body to ensure a higher comfort level. Too much hair on body makes it uncomfortable to enjoy each inch of your lover. So look out for a soft and clean skin in your partner complemented with a nice smell, as a bad body odour is a huge turn-off. 
Hot tip : "During sexual intimacy, everyone wants a hygienically fit partner, as this not only enhances the comfort level, but lets you enjoy the act more. So make sure you seem as fresh as if you have just stepped out of the shower before getting into bed. Sexual scents and aphrodisiacal fragrances are a good choice," recommends Dr. Devesh Roy, a sex therapist. 
2. Oral sex shouldn't be an issue 
You know what pleases you, so a wonderful partner to have in bed is one who doesn't hesitate going out of the way to give you that pleasure. If not routinely, your partner should be ready to please you orally as per their own mood and comfort level. While no one is perfectly adept at the oral act, but a partner who tries learning the little tricks to arouse you can surely add magic to your love life. 
Hot tip : "Don't wait for your partner to tell you or give hints each time they feel like experiencing oral pleasure, instead make it a part of the love making act. It is quite safe and enjoyable as the actual act, so don't be unwilling to go for it," states Dr. Deepak Gupta, a sex expert. 
3. Be an adventure lover 
Intimacy and passion gets killed if you have a boring partner, who is having sex for the sake of it. Ensure that he/she makes every effort to heighten the sensation by exploring their adventurous side. Having a partner who is open to trying new sexual pleasures is a definite bonus. Right from participating in dirty talks, taking chocolate baths with you, trying out new positions to indulging in naughty love games, he/she should be keen to try sex escapades that make them a perfect bedroom partner. 
Hot tip : "Like a weekend getaway gives you a much needed break, sex also can become monotonous after a sluggish period. To liven it up, you need to think out-of-the-box and try all kinds of sexual adventures that ensure a gratifying experience," shares Dr. Kirti. 
4. A sexy shape can do wonders 
Though weighty issues shouldn't come in way of your sexual pleasure, yet it's natural to look for a partner sans love handles or a bulging belly as an overweight partner can mar your sexual life. Being in top shape gives your body greater flexibility and accentuates your bedroom performance. If seeing your partner semi-naked makes you feel irresistible and you can't think of anything except sex, what else you can ask for! 
Hot tip : "Good body shape is always welcomed and what adds to your sex appeal is an appropriate dressing sense with which you can underline your positive features and gear up for a hot bedroom romp. To be a perfect partner in bed, try shedding the accumulated fat on your belly or butt area to boost your performance," suggests Dr. Roy. 
5. Propose newer things 
It's excellent to take charge in bed sans any inhibitions. But what makes sex even more special is to bring new-fangled sex ideas and implement them. A vivid imagination and voracious desires can contribute to healthy sexuality. With an avid sex lover who is willing to try arousing positions in bed, use sex toys, suggest new ways to climax, explore alternate seduction techniques and foreplay acts, the sex romp can be one of its kind. 
Hot tip : "Being innovative is good, but it is of no use if you confine this sexual knowledge just to yourself. Hence, be more forthcoming in your approach and propose new ways to improve your bedroom pleasure and perform actively," advices Dr. Kirti. 
6. Fantasy sharing does magic 
Communication holds the key to sexual pleasure, so a partner who is keen to discuss their wildest dreams and desires in bed can make sex a heavenly act. No partner can be tagged as sexually perfect until they are open about discussing their innate sexual preferences, as these tell the partner how they can perform. Look out for a partner who is not only open about their fantasies, but also invites you to share yours with a reassurance to fulfill them with ease. 
Hot tip : "If you cannot be outspoken about your sexual fantasies, you may resort to measures like penning them down or recording them on a tape. But ensure that it reaches your partner at the right time before you slip between the sheets," says Dr. Gupta. 

Men avoiding sex counselling before marriage

A new study has revealed that men on the verge of marriage should avoid sex counselling if they want to have a "problem-free" love life. The study looked into the sexual prowess of couples, and found that women who undergo pre-wedding counselling were more satisfied in the marital bedroom, whereas men who do not attend counselling were more satisfied in bed. In the research, 36 couples were asked to undergo premarital sex counselling, while 35 were asked not to, and the results showed that the sessions reduced fear and reluctance in the bedroom. "Through its ability to address and remove fear and misunderstanding and the resulting sexual reluctance and related problems, premarital sexual education and counselling can contribute to sexual satisfaction," News.com.au quoted the researchers as saying. Almost 81 per cent of women who attended the sessions had a "problem-free sexual life", compared to their non-counselled counterparts of which 77 percent had a similar result. But the researchers, from Pamukkale University and Ege University in Turkey, found that the sex lives of men were much better without the counselling. Despite the difference in satisfaction between the genders, the researchers said that couples should attend the sex counselling. "A recommendation to encourage engaged couples to attend premarital sexual counselling is made based on the findings," the research said of the findings published in the CSIRO journal Sexual Health. "It is thought that an intervention plan ... will help nurses guide recently married couples to greater sexual satisfaction," the researchers added.

Sex scenes make sense, says Jennifer Connelly

Jennifer Connelly believes that sex scenes are mostly uncomfortable, but insists they're nowhere near as bad as everyone make them out to be.

She told Britain''s Guardian newspaper: "Sex scenes are incredibly awkward, they''re always uncomfortable. I think they''re overused and people get very flustered by them.

"People don''t know how to discuss them and there''s a lot of embarrassment."

However, the 'Hulk' star insists that sometimes the scenes are logical, The China Daily reports.

"It''s not my favourite thing to do, but there are circumstances in which they make sense. I just wish people wouldn''t dance around them," she said.

Jennifer stars alongside her real-husband Paul Bettany, who plays evolutionary biologist Charles Darwin, in new film ''Creation.''

She said: "We had heard a lot of opinions about it but I wanted to work with Paul because he''s a very good actor and I thought it would be a privilege to work with him.

"There are certain scenarios people don''t want to see, like a married couple having sex in a film.

" But I don''t want to see a sexy movie about Charles Darwin, and the filmmakers didn''t want to make that film, so it seemed like there was nothing about our personal pairing that could take away from the film."

Scots are the 'sexiest' people

A new survey has found that the Scots spend a whopping 35million pounds a year to pump up their sex lives.

Scots spend 1.3 times the national average on their sex lives, and rank ahead of people in Wales, which is second followed by England at third and Northern Ireland at the fourth spot.

Online sex shop Love-Honey.co.uk has estimated that the 4,122,807 Scots, aged above 18, spend nearly 8.54 pounds a year on sex toys, lingerie, role-play costumes, and erotic literature to boost their sex lives, reports the Sun.

The survey also reveals that Scottish pairs prefer sex at home than expensive night outs to save on cash.

Forres in Morayshire has been rated the 'sexiest' place in Scotland with lusty residents spending more than twice the national average on their sex lives.

The locals here also lap up about six times more porn than the average Brit.

Sex expert and author Tracey Cox said: "It''s a positive for relationships - it shows an openness and willingness by the people in Scotland to make an effort to try new things."

Elgin and Shetland are placed second and third on the sexiest spots' list.

According to the survey, Brits spends almost 315million pounds in a year on naughty items.

Airing risque sexual material good for people

An Aussie sexual health physician has credited the producers of the show ''Packed to the Rafters'' for bringing sex into the mainstream by airing risque sexual material on TV.

''Packed to the Rafters'' came under fire after an episode containing raunchy fantasy sequences and a masturbation scene was aired on Tuesday.

Dr. Christine Read, however, has applauded the producers by saying that Australians are not as sexually savvy as they think, and are at the risk of unplanned pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.

She claimed that shows like ''The 7pm Project'' (Network Ten) and ''Packed to the Rafters'' (Seven Network) were "pushing the boundaries."

She said that the Australian public were quite sensitive to the topic while politicians also found the issue difficult.

"There are so many myths around sex and sexuality and how you can or cannot get pregnant even in this day and age. So shows that get people talking about sex are really important," News.com.au quoted Read as telling AAP.

Earlier this week, the blog site of ''Packed to the Rafters'' attracted angry posts from viewers.

However, Read, who is also a spokesperson for Sexual Health and Family Planning Australia, said that it is important for families to talk about sex.

Better sexual education programs in schools were also needed because the current system was ad hoc, she said.

Drooling over women comes naturally to men

Flirting with a pretty woman is a mouth-watering prospect for men - literally.

That''s the conclusion of a new study, which found that blokes feel good while flirting with an attractive lady, reports The Daily Express.

In the research, boffins found that just being in the presence of a pretty member of the opposite sex causes a temporary boost in levels of testosterone and cortisol - both hormones associated with alertness and wellbeing.

However hanging around with other men has the opposite affect - reducing the levels of both substances in the body.

Researchers at the University of California reported the findings in the biological journal, Proceedings of the Royal Society.

Psychologist Dr James Roney, who led the research, said: "Both testosterone and cortisol increased among men who spoke with women but declined among men who interacted with other men."

The amount of sexual experience a man had was irrelevant to the hormonal reaction, tests found.

The research included 149 male students aged between 18 and 24 with a third interacting with a male researcher of 25 and the others talking to one of seven young female undergraduates aged 18 to 22.

Smart people are sexier

A person''s sex quotient lies in his or her brain, according to a study that suggests that being smart is sexy, and the smartest males get the most partners.

Through a study on Australian birds, a team of researchers have lent support to the idea that our big human brain evolved because it is a sexually attractive organ, not just a useful one.

According to the above theory, signs of intelligence - such as creating art, music, and humour - could have made the brainiest people luckiest in love.

The theory was hugely discussed in the book ''The Mating Mind'' by an evolutionary psychologist, Geoffrey Miller, almost a decade ago.

Jason Keagy, of the University of Maryland in the US, said that testing the theory in humans was very difficult, and thus he chose to observe satin bowerbirds at Wallaby Creek in NSW instead.

He claimed that Bowerbirds are intelligent.

''''But they''re not as complex as humans," Stuff.co.nz quoted him as saying.
Keagy could get an accurate record of the male birds'' sexual success by videotaping their every movement.
''''They can''t really lie to us," he said.

Known for their fascination with blue objects, bowerbirds have a strong aversion to red.

In the first IQ test, the researchers placed three red objects under a clear plastic container in their bower, and found that the smartest males could remove the cover and carry away the offending objects in 20 seconds.

''''It looks pretty simple, but some weren''t able to do it,'''' said Keagy.

In a second braintwister, he glued a red object down and observed that some bowerbirds kept on trying in vain to pull it out, while the brighter ones quickly twigged this was impossible and covered it with leaves.

The males who failed the plastic container test were spurned.
''''No females were mating with them,'''' said Keagy.

However, the smartest birds attracted up to 20 female partners a season.
''''This is the first evidence [in any species] that individuals with better problem-solving abilities are more sexually attractive,'''' he said.

He claimed that greater intelligence could allow male bowerbirds to woo more females because they can build more elaborate bowers, are better dancers or are more responsive to subtle cues from the females during courtship.

Alternative theories to the mating mind include that our large brain evolved because it was advantageous for hunting or living in social groups, and cultural creativity was simply a fortuitous by-product of the struggle to survive.

The study has been published in the journal Animal Behaviour.

Drooling over women comes naturally to men

Flirting with a pretty woman is a mouth-watering prospect for men - literally.

That''s the conclusion of a new study, which found that blokes feel good while flirting with an attractive lady, reports The Daily Express.

In the research, boffins found that just being in the presence of a pretty member of the opposite sex causes a temporary boost in levels of testosterone and cortisol - both hormones associated with alertness and wellbeing.

However hanging around with other men has the opposite affect - reducing the levels of both substances in the body.

Researchers at the University of California reported the findings in the biological journal, Proceedings of the Royal Society.

Psychologist Dr James Roney, who led the research, said: "Both testosterone and cortisol increased among men who spoke with women but declined among men who interacted with other men."

The amount of sexual experience a man had was irrelevant to the hormonal reaction, tests found.

The research included 149 male students aged between 18 and 24 with a third interacting with a male researcher of 25 and the others talking to one of seven young female undergraduates aged 18 to 22.

Women have sex to relieve boredom

Women indulge in sex not for love and passion, but for various other “unromantic” reasons including relieving themselves of boredom, out of pity for a man and even to cure a migraine headacheâ says a new book.

‘Why Women Have Sex’ by Cindy Meston and David Buss has highlighted 200 reasons as to why women have sexual intercourse.

While attraction ranks way down in the list, it seems that women go to bed with their partners as a way of relieving boredom, keeping the peace, curing a headache and even as a thank you for a nice dinner.

“Research has shown that most men find most women at least somewhat sexually attractive, whereas most women do not find most men sexually attractive at all,” the Telegraph quoted the authors, who are both psychology professors at the University of Texas, as saying.

The researchers interviewed 1,006 women as research for the book, and found some very surprising answers.

One revealed that she did it for a spiritual experience, as she thought it to be “the closest thing to God”.

Others listed “cure for stress headache”, “to make my sexual skills better” and “for a clearer complexion”.

However, the majority (84 per cent), admitted that they had sex to ensure a quiet life or to bargain for their partners to carry out household chores.

“I have sex to relieve the boredom. Because it’s easier than fighting. Plus it gives me something to do,” said one of the interviewee.

While another admitted: “I had sex with a couple of guys because I felt sorry for them.”

One of the surveys carried out by the authors revealed that one in ten women admitted having sexual intercourse in return for presents, or lavish meals.

Responses included “he bought me a nice dinner” or “he spent a lot of money on me early on”, “he gave me gifts early on” and “he showed me he had an extravagant lifestyle”.

Online date-chats may lead to unsafe sex

People who go online to find sex partners are likely to have unsafe sex, reveals a new survey.

According to Dr Philippe Adam, the act of engaging in "fantasy" cyber chatting on online matchmaking sites could encourage unsafe sex.

"Something very specific is created in the dynamic of chatting that produces risk," News.com.au quoted Adam as saying.

"Most people think going online will not have any consequences in real life but the results we have show the contrary," he added.

During the study, the researchers analysed almost 2600 users of a gay match-making website in France.

It found almost 96 per cent of the men said they intended to use a condom for any resulting sexual encounter.

However, 32 per cent went on to have unprotected sex when they had a real, as opposed to virtual, meeting.

The study also showed that those whose shared "fantasy" conversations included references to unsafe sex were far more likely to later engage in it.

The research finding runs counter to a commonly held view, said Adam, that most people who used these websites were seeking partners for unsafe sex.

"That's less than five per cent, it's only a couple of per cent among gay men and it is certainly even lower in the heterosexual population," he said.

"In fact, people go online without having the intention to take risk but they start progressively engaging in sharing fantasies online, sometimes they accept some fantasies around unprotected sex, and this creates scripts in their mind that influence their real life behaviour," he added.

Adam says that a similar Australian-based study of the impact of cyber-chat on sex practises would soon get underway, with results expected early next year.